Monday, April 24, 2006

A Pretend Girlfriend Of My Own

I've been seriously thinking about getting a pretend girlfriend. I've heard of the concept before and with the recent inquiries made by my Mom, I was wondering when folks from work will start inquiring. Not necessarily about if I'm gay but when am I getting a girlfriend.

I went to this anniversary lunch recently for one of my co-workers and this one guy I thought would never get hitched started talking about his upcoming wedding plans. He was going on and on about it. Of course I had nothing of the sort to share and I feared someone asking me the question.

Since a lot of my favorite lady bloggers are unfortunately not in the Chicago area(*LOL*), I was thinking I need to find another lady that wouldn't mind being my pretend girlfriend. Basically this lady would be privy to knowing about my real preferences, of course. She would have to occasionally attend work related functions with me and pretend to be really into me. We'd work out the logistics of how we met and stuff like that.

The lady I want would have to have her own personal goals, have some common sense, be quick-witted, and be able to adapt to any given situation with the ease of a tigress. Hopefully this lady and I would become really great friends in time.

I have some fantasies of what my pretend girlfriend would look like. Here's a few:




















The one lady friend that I have in my life Sally could potentially be cool, but she would squick out at the thought of pretending to be into me. Plus I've already introduced her to some of the circle as my friend, which she is. So she's out of the running.

I thought about asking this one lady at my job (actually she's the person that was celebrating her 20th anniversary last week at that lunch). Lana and I actually have a really cool relationship at work and she was one of my bowlers on the team. Oddly enough, Reid kept hinting that I should pair myself up with her after her recent divorce. From my years of knowing Lana, I get the sense I could trust her with my secret.

She'd be perfect too because we'd have a perfect reason for keeping the relationship secret.

But I think my "pretend girlfriend" should be someone nobody knows.

So are there ladies in the Chicago area that might be interested? Holla at a brother!

19 Comments:

Blogger K Kaos said...

Lol..U need a Grace Adler..or maybe even a Karen Walker..

12:45 AM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger 4GOTTEN1 said...

I say fuck what people say tell them u like to keep your personal life seperate from the professinal. If u are dating someone tell them that but that's all u tell them. Don't put on a show for those people. They aren't that important.

8:40 AM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Cash S. said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

9:13 AM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Cash S. said...

I agree with K Kaos, get you a "fag hag". The show Will and Grace is the perfect example.

9:13 AM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Karamale said...

why your pretend girlfriends look like every straight man's fantasy girlfriend?

5:15 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger princessdominique said...

I hope you find someone!

8:40 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger That Dude Right There said...

E, you have got to be kidding me, right? I really don't think that this is a good idea. What happens if the woman actually falls for you?

9:31 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Harold Gibson said...

Wow this is interesting. It is too bad we can't accept people for who they are so they have to "pretend" oh well, good luck, who knows this might just "straighten" you out.

11:53 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger NegroPino™ said...

IM not in Chicago but Im interested :)

I have a "pretend" boyfriend He's the BEST

7:52 AM, April 26, 2006  
Blogger *Madosi said...

wha?! pretend g/f?

hmmmmmm, interesting concept ... but ummmmm, yeah ok!

10:21 AM, April 26, 2006  
Blogger dugla said...

As much as I agree with all of these comments, I've thought about this too, not because I care about what others think... more because dudes vs. women as companions leave much to be desired. That dude right there brings up a good point which is why you should go with my suggestion. Here in New York, a lot of bisexual women/ lesbians are HOT. Thats where I may start and I'll let you know how it goes!

1:37 PM, April 26, 2006  
Blogger David E. Patton said...

I agree with 4gotten1. I have been out for some time but I still recall when I wasn't and thought about getting a PGF. I never act on it and to think about it it can get a bit sticky when you are dealing with other people emotion. Still if you decide to go a head with this I wish you much luck.

2:42 PM, April 26, 2006  
Blogger Marz said...

Now I know you should come out on your time, but this would be digression of coming out BIG TIME.

However, if you got a boyfriend that did REALLY GREAT drag then HOOK IT UP.



-Marz

6:28 PM, April 26, 2006  
Blogger Mr. Maurice said...

Yes the fag hag concept works well.. But you can also get one of your godo judies who happens to be a feminine dyke and let her be the made up girlfriend.

10:13 PM, April 26, 2006  
Blogger Rose said...

Never mess with women on the job, or males. Problems.. she may like you but if she falls for you and you reject her then your business is all over the office.

10:30 PM, April 26, 2006  
Blogger Bklyn Diva said...

LMAO.. yes fag hags work best :0) but like I said in my other post.. it can be pretty sticky.. :)

you will be fine E.. just relax..


and damn CAN DEM PRETEND GIRLFRIENDS GET SOME MEAT ON DEY BONES... *eye roll*

7:11 AM, April 27, 2006  
Blogger DSTcretion said...

lol I was thinkin the SAME thing lol. But yea E everything will be just fine baby.

2:13 PM, April 27, 2006  
Blogger TeeBee said...

LOL @ Karamale.....I was thinking the same thing.

*clearing my throat* Where's my picture???

Nah, for real, don't front for those people. Let them think what they want. We do enough pretending on the job. We don't have to add this to the list now, do we?

7:51 PM, April 27, 2006  
Blogger lady in satin said...

HAHA!! Has it really come to this, E?! I would love to be your pretend girlfriend. But I'm not in Chicago! =)

7:29 PM, May 17, 2006  

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