Reality Junkie

Hi. My name is E and I have a problem. I'm addicted to reality TV. It started out innocent enough. A Survivor episode here, The Mole episode there. (Awwww...I miss The Mole. That was my show damn it!) I've come to the realization that 80% of my viewing habits involves some element of reality TV.

Let's take earlier this year. VH1, a station I hardly watched much in the past, premiered two reality TV shows that put the focus on objectifying males. Needless to see, I became VH1's bitch! I'm talking about Kept and Strip Search. Of the two shows, Kept was actually the more interesting one. The concept behind the show was that Jerry Hall was on this quest to find her "kept" man, a job with unclear expectations as was seen when she ultimately chose the most uncouth & unkept man of all, Seth. A friend of mine who I debated on this (yeah the things I debate about...*LOL*) told me that her choice of Seth made sense because despite his unorthodox behavior, he was the only one that made her laugh & got the real Jerry to come out. I saw his point, maybe, but why go through all those bullshit exercises saying that a kept man must do this and must do that if she winds up picking someone who didn't even try on most of his tasks. Tasks that were deemed things a "kept" man is supposed to do. I had a mad crush on Devonric & if it were me, he would've been the one I chose. I mean...look at him:

Ok fine. I suppose he may not have been the most articulate person in the group. And yes, CONVERSATE is not a word...*LOL*. But I'm sure with some polishing and such, he'd have been perfect.

Or maybe it was my wishful thinking...*LOL*. I love ya anyway D, even though you don't know me from Adam.

You'd think a show titled Strip Search would be interesting. But it wound up being the most boring dreck created. Yet I couldn't look away. It was like one of those train wrecks that you can't help but watch. The mistakes were plenty. They spent two episodes focusing on the selection process Billy and some chick I can't remember had regarding potential strippers. Who freaking cares? Then it seemed like they picked guys for the drama factor. It was hilarious hearing some of these guys act like stripping for a living was their biggest dream ever. Plus these guys were so melodramatic, you'd think you were in a sorority. Billy's reasons for eliminating guys was so bogus. For example, two of the guys he dropped because of their kid issues. Basically the guys expressed how much they missed them (although hello, it's not like you'll never see them again. Get a grip...*LOL*). The thing is Billy knew they had family so to use that as an excuse to kick them off was stupid. Gah...but glued to my TV I was through it all so they must've done something right...*LOL*.

Then just as those two series were ending. VH1 threw a triple punch with Surreal Life 5, Hogan Knows Best, and Celebrity Fit Club 2. Fortunately Hogan's show wasn't that compelling to me but I got sucked into SL5 and CFC2. My favorites on CFC2 were Victoria Jackson & Toccara of America's Next Top Model fame. The latter looked hotter and hotter as the weeks went by. It was cool seeing her sashaying across the walkway like it was a runway. The show, of course, added its own elements of drama. I guess they do whatever it takes to reel viewers in.

Then there's SL5. I knew it'd be crazy when they included nutjobs Janice Dickinson (another ANTM alum and claims to be the world's first supermodel) and Omarosa (Apprentice 1 reject.). Toss in Balki from Perfect Strangers and Jose Conseco and you have the makings for nutty TV. Since Surreal Life moved to VH1, the series has an annoying habit of showing only 5-10 minutes of new footage while airing the same ol' crap they already shown at least two or three times. They're milking it for all it's worth, which actually when it comes right down to it, ain't worth much.

To make things worse, Apprentice is back. But it's not one version but two. What's a reality junkie to do? Watch them both I guess. Along with America's Next Top Model. Good grief. Talk about reality overload. Maybe it's about time I focus on my reality...:-)