Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Reach Out And I'll Throttle You

Eugene and I recently had a conversation about his date last weekend. He was basically connecting with this guy that he chatted back and forth with on Yahoo IM. He told me the guy was 6"3 (probably 6"1 1/2...*LOL*...see my earlier post of the day to find out about that rant), 210 pounds of dark chocolate muscle. Needless to say I was intrigued.

Eugene met this guy in a public place to avoid any possibility of having relations. So he was telling me all about the date, which I won't detail since he'll have to get his own blog. However one thing he said peaked my interest and thus motivated me to post this entry (while playing hooky from the job...*LOL*).

One of Eugene's pet peeves is when a date answers their cell phone in the middle of their outing. He was even peeved at me when I picked up my cell phone to answer his call during the middle of my summer date with That Asshole That Shall Not Be Named (even if it is a fake name...*LOL*). His thought process is that if you're taking the time to get to know a person, it's rude to be carrying a conversation with someone else.

So Hemingway his date's cell phone was ringing during lunch. Eugene told me that he gave his date the 'I dare you to pick up that phone look'. And his date didn't. That had me rolling.

As we talked some more, I realized that I could actually see Eugene's point. (Then again seeing things from different perspectives has been my forte. It's a curse sometimes too.) I remember when TATSNBN was chatting on his cell phone making plans for the next day with someone while out with me, how peeved I was. The only thing is I had little ground to complain because I unfortunately picked up my cell earlier on him. I hate to say it too but I think I saw a glimmer of anger in TATSNBN's eyes when I did that. Who knows, maybe that's what led to his actions later.

The truth is, I normally don't pick up my cell phone if I'm hanging out with someone. The only time I would is if I was bored with the date and needed a breakaway. But I guess I saw it was Eugene and broke that rule.

I too have had situations where I was in the middle of something intense with someone and that person chose to answer their phone. That killed the mood instantly and I usually would end things there.

The thing is, do people always have to be available for someone when they call? Nine times out of ten the caller on the other end has trivial shit to talk about anyway. Voice mail was created for a reason. Right?

I recently had a coffee date (literally at Starbuck's) with a guy and my work pager was going off. I kept trying to ignore it (it was on vibrate) because I was having a great conversation with him. Finally after the fourth page, I realized that I needed to pick it up. So I regrettably told him I had to check my pager and he decided to check on his email. I wound up having to call the office. Sigh. Luckily the date ended coolly but I couldn't help thinking how much easier it would be if we didn't have gadgets interrupting all the time.

It's amazing how cell phones have changed people's lives. I mean, what the hell did people do before the popularity of cell phones? If someone wanted to reach you and you were out, they left a message and if you need to call them later, you do.

So my new rule, if I'm on support that month, I mention it to any dates I may have so that I won't be totally rude. A date I had a year ago also told me ahead of time that he would need to be on a 30 minute conference call while we were out. We were playing phone tag a lot previously so despite that, I went through with the date. But it was cool that he told me ahead of time so that I wouldn't be too upset. I made the choice to deal with it as opposed to having it made for me.

On the bright side, I know when Eugene and I have lunch after the holidays, it'll be interruption free on both ends. That's so refreshing.

I guess I better drive my ass to work. Later.


Blogger ProfessorGQ said...

one of my friends had a really good romantic time that was ruined by his mate answering a cell phone...dude was pissed off!!!

4:31 PM, December 21, 2005  
Blogger That Dude Right There said...

I have a solution for the cell phone thing. I turn it off, not just vibrate, but off. And I do it in front of the date so that he can get the hint to do the same.

"Eugene told me that he gave his date the 'I dare you to pick up that phone look'. And his date didn't."

That's how you handle it!

7:19 PM, December 21, 2005  
Blogger Rose said...

This just doesn't happen on a date but everywhere. I can't stand to have dinner with my sister and she answers her phone an yack for 10 minutes or so. I told her that not only was it disrepectable, I had no interest in hearing their chit-chat. Mery Christmas E.

7:52 PM, December 21, 2005  
Blogger TeeBee said...

Okay, that is my pet peeve too!!! But I have to admit that I'm guilty of it. I was at a friend's house and we were both on our much for quality time, heh?

10:53 PM, December 21, 2005  
Blogger NeenaLove said...

i think it's not just rude but it totally tells the other person that they're not as important as the person on the phone. work MIGHT be a valid excuse... but na uh... "i dare you to pick up that phone"... hysterical!!!

2:44 AM, December 22, 2005  
Blogger princessdominique said...

You're right. Those gadgets can get annoying and they aren't allowed on vacation with us. At least that puts the "v" in vacation. Otherwise it'll be like any other ordinary day. Thanks for stopping by.

6:36 AM, December 22, 2005  
Blogger ShawnQt said...


I would pick up my phone, but won't hold a conversation, and may only pick up the phone twice.

9:33 AM, December 22, 2005  
Blogger Brains Nbooty said...

a recent date of mine kept the phone on while we were in the movies. tre rude!!! and then she kept looking at it, and had to nerve to answer it a one point.

and this was our first date!!

needless to say, we're not going out now!!!

12:08 PM, December 22, 2005  
Blogger K said...

actually i rather the person answer as long as they keep the conversation brief. i have dated people who insisted that i answer my phone in front them since "i don't have anything to hide anyway".

i guess it all depends on the person and the insecurity level or the lack thereof.

12:17 PM, December 22, 2005  
Blogger Marz said...

I don't have a cell phone.

But when I'm out with friends, and we have conversations. Someone usually calls. When they're done talking, I restart the conversation from the same place we left off.

But I guess it is different if you're on a date.


8:27 AM, December 23, 2005  
Blogger Karamale said...

i don't mind someone answering the phone either, as long as the convo's brief and includes something like "gotta go, i'm being rude." it may be an emergency. thanks for stopping by.

1:43 PM, December 23, 2005  
Blogger jameil1922 said...

ummm... yeah. anyone i'm with better find me so interesting that he doesn't even FEEL his phone vibrating! lol

5:43 PM, December 23, 2005  
Blogger The Captain said...

I can certainly understand someone having to answer their paging and telecommunication devices for work purposes. However, you have some ingnorant people who use that to just look busy or to be noticeable for show...that is what will piss me off the most.

10:22 PM, December 23, 2005  

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