Thursday, July 20, 2006

Good Bally Hunting

It's amazing all the action that goes on at Bally's. From the moment I walk down the parking lot and head towards the building, I can see the eyes staring from those on the treadmills. What are they thinking when they see me? Do they see a stylish, virile (heh), strapping negro brother? Or do they wonder what the heck he's wearing? Are my shorts too short and skimpy? Do they see the sweat stains from my athletic tee from the day before?

I can't say that I'm innocent either. As I enter the gym, I'm eyeing the joint for some interesting eye candy. Occasionally I hit the jackpot. But I dare not let any guy know that I'm staring at them. You know...that whole gay stigma thing. Although if I were going to an actual Chicago area gym (as opposed to the burbs), I could definitely stare with no shame in my game. Not that I do...since you know, I do go to the gym primarily to work out. But in Chicago, the gay males are in full force as I found out during my working it out date months back. Dudes jacking off in the shower area while staring at me, dudes purposely brushing up against me in the locker. Okay it was two dudes in all but there didn't seem to be a shortage of others that wouldn't do the same.

Eugene and I got into a discussion recently about a couple of encounters he's had at the gym. Eugene's about twenty pounds heavier than myself so he seems to attract more of the muscular athletic types than I do. So Hemingway he was telling me how he caught this hot chocolate 220-lb solid frame brotha staring at him as he walked towards the water fountain. That same said brotha later on situated himself inside a shower where everyone in the lockerroom could see him in all his naked glory.

Then there's this other athletic brotha that actually chats with Eugene whenever he sees him, the brotha even going as far as flexing his muscles in front of him.

I told Eugene that since I'm visiting him mid-August, I'll have to go to his Bally's and check these hot commodities out for myself. I then lamented how I rarely get any attention from those type of guys.

Eugene then began this extensive discussion on what he calls the "Masculinity Index". Basically all guys can be rated anywhere from 1 (Little Richard) to 5 (Mr. T.). Eugene first asked me how I would rate myself. I told him that I know I'm not the most masculine guy but I don't think of myself as overly femme either so I gave myself a 3. I rated Eugene as a 3.5.

Of course, Eugene had different opinions on that. He rated me a 2.75 while he rated himself a 3.8.

The ratings obviously are subjective to individual opinions. One person's 4 could be another person's 2 and so on, and so on.

So we continued the discussion as we rated various guys in our lives on the Masculinity Index scale. My highest rated guy had a 4 while Eugene's highest had a 4.2. For lowest, I rated one guy a 2 while he rated his lowest a 2.5.

Both of Eugene's encounters were rated by him to be 3.5 or higher. He then pointed out that a lot of guys rated that high wouldn't want to be seen chatting with someone that's less than a 3. Someone like me...*LOL*. So in other words, that was the logical explanation why I never get encounters such as he described.

It was an interesting theory. And with all theories, nothing is 100% foolproof as there's always exceptions to the rules.

You know what, though. I don't really go in the gym for a manhunt. But that doesn't mean I don't look for some pleasing stimulation. Nothing like a hard body to keep one motivated to keep coming. Eugene himself told me that if the hot chocolate 220 brotha even showed a smigdeon of interest in him, he'd become a gym junkie quicker than I could say "I've fallen and I can't get up". I told him I hope he does and he needs to do it before I get there. That way, he can introduce him to me and I could try to be the exception. Heh.


Blogger That Dude Right There said...

I swear it's only the old and ugly that stare me down.

And the locker room? I ain't even going down there. The one time I did, a dude stared me down and then dropped his towel as an invite. I almost tripped getting out of there.

11:56 PM, July 20, 2006  
Blogger Rose said...

Wow those are very upfront, forward acting dudes. You do have some very interesting stories. The ratings are interesting though.If women did that kind of stuff we would be considered whores...nasty...trifling right?

9:54 PM, July 22, 2006  
Blogger lj said...

well I always look but never touch.

12:47 AM, July 23, 2006  
Blogger That Girl said...

Wow, rating me huh?

1:05 AM, July 23, 2006  
Blogger taylorSiluw√© ..... said...

Pretty cool theory. And I think he has a point. I consider myself a 3, smack dab in the middle of the scale.

But when I drink, I morph into a 2.

My boyfriend constantly tells me I listen to too much gay music, to which I respond, 'What kinda fag would I be if I didn't?'

6:05 AM, July 23, 2006  
Blogger *Madosi said...

at the gym i am currently a member of there are a lot of attractive guys and since my eyes tend to wander, i go at times when there are not a lot of people in the gym.

i feel ya though, it is tempting and motivating.

2:00 PM, July 24, 2006  
Blogger The Captain said...

Sick! You guys know that you run to these gyms with the focus and inspiration of eye candy being there.

Trust me, if you would take away the eye candy (male or female) the gym attendance rate will drop sharply.

2:50 PM, July 24, 2006  
Blogger Clay said...

MR. T as the five??? Oh lawd ...

6:46 PM, July 24, 2006  
Blogger No_the_game said...

Uh oh!!! No eye candy at my gym. But enough ungly looking dudes. There is one who screams every time he lift 5 pounds *LOL*

10:41 PM, July 25, 2006  
Blogger Delaleuverses said...

Hmmmmmmmmmmm, I miss going to Bally's, I recall the many eye candies there and I made sure I wore my tight-ass shorts, lol, those were the days. It's not the same at the gym here at work, it's a whole bunch of old white men winking at me and most don't have their dentures, lol, yuck...I hardly see any brothers at my gym. I wish I could go back to Bally's but you can't beat the free membership at my work gym :)I agree with you about the hard bodies keeping you motivated, that's what I miss the most seeing some girl's tight belly and toned arms and buns used to have me running faster than a speeding light on the treadmill, now I just stroll as opposed to racing like I used to.
Great post.

6:52 AM, July 27, 2006  
Blogger nosthegametoo said...

Mr. T is never going out of style.

12:44 AM, August 01, 2006  

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