Friday, August 19, 2005

Bowling The Nice Life!

Previously on Half & Half, Tit & Tat....

I called Vince again two weeks after our initial date & arranged another date that day. He was available. I suggested before bowling that we pick up a quick bite to eat at a TGIF's not far from the alley selected. He was game so we met there.

We had an interesting lunch. I chatted about flirting with a cashier who was closed and getting her to ring up my items. He chatted about his job. He works for the state prison as part of security. I mentioned my recent fascination with 310+ thread count sheets. I have Queer Eye for the Straight Guy to thank for even knowing about thread counts. There was one odd moment ten minutes within the lunch. There was a group of russian (not sure of the origin actually) guys sitting at the next booth behind us. As I was talking, I noticed Vince kept giving this odd stare towards them. I was sitting with my back towards them so I had no idea what was going on. I turned around briefly and didn't notice anything. I asked Vince what was up and he wouldn't say. When the group finally left, I asked again. He said that one of the guys took a photograph of him. He asked if I noticed the flash, which I didn't. I made some joke that his face will probably be in a porn magazine attached to another guy's body. He then told his tale of how three girls decided to take a photo of him with their cell phone. (Sidenote...I had no reason to believe he was lying, though when I told Eugene about it, he theorized that the story was Vince's way of letting me know that he considers himself a "hot" commodity and that I was lucky to be hanging with him. He also didn't believe those guys really took a picture of him.)

So after lunch we decided to head for the alley. He told me that he'd follow me over there in his car. I raised my brow and laughed. If you recall, during our last outing, Vince drove off so I wouldn't be following him. I made some comment that I don't like people following me. He laughed, I'm assuming because he recalled our last outing. Since the alley was only ten minutes from the restaurant, I suggested we drive together in my car instead and I'd swing back afterwards and take him to his car. Oddly enough as I was getting in the car, I noticed he was just standing by my open door staring at something. It took me a minute to get his attention and he never mentioned what he was distracted by.

We got to the alley and then learned that we had to manually keep score. We decided to keep each other's score to keep it honest. I was a bit more cool this date, trying not to fawn all over him like I did our first encounter. I even retracted my initial offer of giving him my old bowling ball, saying that I would need it after all. Of course, he said he had forgotten about that. Whatever...*LOL*. Long story short, we bowled five games (I think he even won one against me...*LOL*) while enduring an alley full of father/daughter day folks. This led to some interesting yet disturbing convo between us. Vince mentioned coming across a site where there were men that basically talked about their daughters and admired other men's daughters. It sounded a bit perverted.

We then played another four rounds of pool, where I actually won a game as well.

Our date ended and Vince asked me if I liked going out to drink. I told him I did. But I assumed it wasn't for that night since I needed to get home. So we agreed that we'd have to make plans another time.

Now for the real interesting stuff...

A couple days later I looked at some old email (yeah I like rereading stuff days afterwards) and noticed that Vince was online. I click on a random name from my IM box and typed his name in, then I shot him a message. He didn't know who I was. After saying my first name, he still needed confirmation. Finally when I mentioned bowling and pool, he got a brain. So we chatted and stuff & I remember asking him if I could add him to my buddy list. I then jumped into this whole side rant about needing to ask because you can't assume. I can't say I remember whether he said 'yes' or not but I decided to add him. He must've went away from the computer because he stopped responding to my inane chatter. I forget about him and run my own errands. Hours later I return to the computer and I get a "decline" from him. I remember being pissed about it but deciding not to respond. The next day I had to leave for an out of town trip to Detroit. It was Memorial Day weekend.

I came back Tuesday and basically decided to say something when I saw he was online via my email program. I basically got pissy and said 'why the heck did you not accept me'? He then said something about his system logging him off and Yahoo automatically sending a decline. (Lies, lies, lies.) Then he said that he doesn't deal with negative people and to have a nice life!

I remember thinking, 'woah, what just happened here?' I may have been a little pissy but that seemed a bit too quick to just dismiss someone. Especially considering it was my first time expressing any displeasure.

I left things alone that night and then called him the next day. Of course, I get his machine. Then I never heard from him again. Until almost three months last Monday.

His message on A4A..."Hey guy, wanna go bowling tomorrow (Tuesday) at such and such alley. $1 games on Tuesday."

When I saw his name flash up in my email box, I was thinking, is this for real? Then I clicked and read that message. I laughed for about a minute, not even thinking that he didn't even remember my name enough to mention it. I was a bit stupid, of course, so I responded..."Hey Vince. It would have to be in the evening. Is the special all day?" (You know. I at least remembered his name...*LOL*) This was in the morning before I left for work. When I got back later that evening, he responded , "Yes, all day."

By that time, Eugene got a hold of me and put some sense in my head. He told me straight up that Vince was basically looking for a quick blowjob and hoped I'd be the sucker to give it to him (oooh..sucker, like that double meaning...*LOL*). He reminded me again about how Vince dropped me like a hot potato months before & all of a sudden he waltzes back in as if nothing's happened. (The moron probably forgot, to tell you the truth...*LOL*) Eugene continued to say that Vince put me on his list of 'lower class people' desperate enough to jump at the opportunity to be with him. I guess that fawning I did first date wasn't such a good idea, huh? He told me if I met him Tuesday night, that would confirm his opinion of me.

Eugene knew it would be hard for me not to want to meet him. He mentioned that his arrogant side would keep him from even responding in the first place. So he suggested I schedule another time for the meeting. Which is what I wound up doing. I made up an excuse for not going and basically asked if next weekend would be okay.

As if to confirm Eugene's theory, Vince didn't even respond to my question. Funny thing, Tuesday night when I got home at 9:30, I saw him logging in and out of A4A. He still hadn't responded to my request. I realized then that Eugene was likely right. He was basically looking for a quick hit and hoped I'd be it.

I'm sure I won't hear from him again until another three-six months when he's forgotten about my last blow off and suggest another meeting.

I was sad for a couple weeks after his initial IM blow-off. I kept blaming myself thinking I fawned a bit too much. Maybe I was too gay with him. Perhaps I shouldn't have been so pissy about the IM blow-off. I got over him eventually after a month.

But I'm really glad he was stupid enough to email me again. It made me realize that it wasn't my fault (entirely, I do realize I did things that made him think I was an easy mark. Remember the fawning...*LOL*) things ended abruptly. I made the mistake of trying to be friends with a jerk.

On another note, I'm grateful for the friendship I have with Eugene. He's become like the big brother I never had in the six months I've chatted with him. Believe it or not, we've never met each other. He was busy working on his Ph D. & trying to find a full-time university job while living three hours away from me. But we manage to chat almost every night. He finally has his Ph. D and found a job in Boston. He moved there last weekend. So we never did get to meet, he instead blew me off for some dates. (Heifer.) But we know if something's on our mind, that we can always call each other. Maybe we're better off not meeting.



Blogger Holiday N said...

That was a great story...I never tried the online dating or chat room stuff..I think I'll do it just to see what it's
Now about Eugene,he sounds very insightful and cool but sometimes some mistakes you have to make on your own.
I have real honest friends that I haven't seen in a very long time and we speak e-mail send pics and everything...that's real friendship,now never seeing someone you're "dating" I don't understand how people do.

6:37 PM, August 19, 2005  
Blogger DizYaBoy said...

i've done da online thing be4. it can be kinda cool.

11:54 PM, August 19, 2005  
Blogger lady in satin said...

What a phucker!!!

I'm so glad that you didn't meet him at the alley, after he blew you off for 3 months! But here's something to think about. Body language can reveal alot about a person. This guy seemed somewhat uncomfortable and anxious, I may be wrong. But that's the picture I paint from what you wrote. I'm glad he's history, because if he can't stare into your eyes when you're talking to him, instead of staring at russian guys in the next booth, then he's not worth your time!!

He may have been hot, but its also good to look within for substance, rather than to focus solely on outter appearance. That is....if you are looking for more than just a quick fix.

Well...that's my two cents!! I know I can be out spoken, so I hope I didn't offend you in any way.


8:51 PM, August 20, 2005  
Blogger taylorSiluw√© ..... said...

yeah ...

that guy was damaged goods, count your blessings he's gone and move on.

Funny thing about lust and guys like that ... its so easy to say, 'fuck him' and plan to never see him again ... 'til he pops up out of the blue, looking better than before, gracing you with his late night bootie-callin' presence.

That's when you'll say, 'Alright, one more time ... but thats it.'

9:17 PM, August 20, 2005  
Blogger E said...

Thanks for the feedback everyone..:-) ain't lying about your comments. The thing is I at least know where things stand & not expect anything at all from Vince. haven't offended me at all. Your outspokeness on your blog is one of the things I enjoy when reading. What you said is on the mark. There are times when I look for a quick fix. I was hoping this wouldn't be one. And yeah, there's more to a good person than just looks.

Ms. Holiday...I hear you about learning for yourself. Part of me would've wanted to go meet him (assuming he didn't find someone better that night and blow me off in the nonenjoyable way...*LOL*) and see what might've transpired. There was a small, small chance that he may have been genuine. But I'll never know now.

12:47 AM, August 22, 2005  
Blogger Marz said...

SCREW VINCE! (lol) ( I'm so extra late... LOL)

You know it's a little interesting. Although your blog was really good before. It's like when you came out on your blog you came more into yourself blogwise. (Interesting.)

Hvae you still not met Eugene?

10:09 PM, February 18, 2006  

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